Prostitution generally involves men paying for sex. Prostitution where women provide sexual services to men is by far the most common form of prostitution. The second most common form of prostitution involves men servicing gay men, who only make up 4% of the male population.
Prostitution is least common among gay women but even straight women pay male escorts for companionship rather than sex. Women want love, romance and a relationship. That’s not always so easy to find. Unfortunately, it is not possible to buy the loving intimacy (based on respect and affection) women hope for when they love someone.
Men generate the demand for prostitution yet it is women who are shamed for the activity. Men, as in many sexual contacts, can remain anonymous but women (for their own protection) must be declared and accountable. Women don’t stand a chance. They and their children are held to ransom against men’s sexual fantasies of the responsive woman based on pornography and prostitution where women are paid to provide men with the turn-ons they need for orgasm. Women have to accept that any relationship with a man is a form of contract to provide sexual services.
Prostitutes are defiled by women because they represent a threat, both physical (real) and psychological. The idea that another woman can provide a man with the sexual release he needs is a threat even though he has to pay for it. It is men who generate the need and the industry. It is women who pay the price: both wives and prostitutes. Men cause the problem because (unlike women) they do not need an emotional connection to enjoy sex. But most men prefer to have it if they can.
Men pay for sex because male sexuality involves a purely biological aspect related to responsiveness. Only some men ever want to combine sex with love. Highly responsive men need to release the sexual tension that accumulates from their regular arousal. The need to be sexually active (to the point of orgasm) plus having the regular opportunity to engage in penetrative sex with a lover is much more emotionally significant to men.
Sex is foremost a biological need for some men that can be relatively easily satisfied by any sexually willing woman. A woman can be described as an ‘evil temptress’ simply because she offers sex to men. We talk of ‘women of pleasure’ or ‘sinful women’. It’s not that women themselves are inherently bad (or necessarily enjoying sexual pleasure themselves) but that their bodies cause male arousal and the subsequent social problems (unwanted pregnancies and tempting men away from their wives).
Women of pleasure’ are prostitutes. Once again men are more easily able to escape responsibility for sex. A woman is called names and shamed by society for being a prostitute. Yet men are not shamed for visiting a prostitute. Women typically go into prostitution as a last resort as a relatively easy way of earning money. In some countries (like Thailand) women have children to support without any contribution from the father.
The men who are most likely to use prostitutes are under thirty and the less educated. More educated men find a prostitute unsatisfying because they want to feel that their lovemaking is appreciated. Prostitutes, especially the cheaper ones, do not feel obliged to make any pretence of being aroused.
When men worry about a threat they don’t imagine hordes of women coming at them over the horizon. They know that men’s motives and intentions are one hundred times more threatening than women’s could ever be. Women don’t have the same drive to conquer, annihilate and destroy. Women have to deal with men such as these in a sexual scenario.
Women in the sex industry interact with men on an emotional and sexual level that is never acknowledged. Even men themselves can be ashamed of their responses but somewhere there’s a woman who is willing to service that need (at a price). This servicing saves other less worldly women from having to engage on the true nature of men’s responses.
Women can be badly treated by male clients who resent women generally or who feel ashamed about the fact that they have needed to resort to using a prostitute as a sexual outlet. Some men simply enjoy beating up women and prostitutes make easy targets. Once again it is women who bear the responsibility and shame of providing for men’s sexual needs.
Prostitution has been called ‘whoring’ and is associated with other social delinquency such as gambling, alcoholism and drug abuse. Financial and social ruin often ensues even for the men who are drawn into this way of life. Venereal disease renders people infertile and can kill eventually. There are several benefits of legalising prostitution including protecting the women involved.
We find that about 69 per cent of the total while male population ultimately has some experience with prostitutes. Many of these males, however, never have more than a single experience or two, and not more than 15 or 20 per cent of them ever have such relations more often than a few times a year, over as much as a five-year period in their lives. This means that there is nearly a third (31%) of the population that never has any sort of sexual contact with prostitutes. (Alfred Kinsey 1948)