For men there is no subject more taboo than penis size. The first issue is a natural competition of virility between men. A man hopes his erect penis will impress others, particularly a lover. A man’s penis is a token of his masculinity. Many men have a penis that is larger than is needed for reproduction. A penis can be a weapon. The bigger it is the more damage it can do. Rape causes damage to a woman’s internal anatomy and can even kill. Consensual intercourse requires the man to use some restraint.
Men’s sexual role (after impregnating women) is to protect the family. In an aggressive situation a man must be physically large and muscular to intimidate an opponent. In a political situation he must be assertive and competent enough to impress an adversary. A man is more of a threat and has more natural authority than a woman has. On the other hand, men are more likely to be accused of engaging in anti-social or perverted behaviour.
Curiosity aside women have little interest in penises. Men assume incorrectly that a woman obtains more pleasure from intercourse if a man has a bigger penis. All internal organs of the body are inert so a woman feels little from intercourse regardless of penis size. If a man has a small penis, a woman is probably no more disappointed than a man might be with a woman having tiny breasts. These things are nice to have but they are not the most important aspect of loving someone. Anyone who feels inadequate over their sexual anatomy probably suffers more than their lovers do.
The testicles hand down from the body because sperm production is optimised at 2 degrees lower than body temperature. If the scrotal temperature rises, a man’s fertility may be reduced. When flaccid, the penis is much smaller than its maximum size. In cold temperatures the penis shrivels to nothing. The testicles and penis are retracted into the body for protection. Men prefer to display an erect penis and may be embarrassed to show their flaccid penis. Most men have a grower, a penis that is small when flaccid but increases in size when erect. Other men have a shower, a penis which increases little in size when they are erect but is larger than average when flaccid. These men have an advantage in the changing room.
It’s unlikely that statistics relating to penis size are accurate. A man only has an erection when he is aroused, which is a private situation. It is difficult to imagine how anyone could measure erect penises in sufficient numbers to provide reliable statistics that could be extended to the whole population. Any research relying on men’s own measurements would be suspect given the challenges of measurement and men’s desire to exaggerate penis size.
Variations in nature often follow a normal distribution curve, which means that most (70%) of measurements fall around the average with relatively few measurements falling either side of the average. If we ignore extremes, we could estimate a maximum penis size of say 20cm. Ignoring extremes again, we could also estimate a smallest penis size of say 5cm. The average would fall in between (around 12cm). The maximum penis size is likely to be limited by the depth of a woman’s vagina. There would be a reproductive disadvantage to having a penis longer than a woman can accommodate.
Size is an issue given men’s desire to be sexually impressive. Men never want to be laughed at and no one is intimidated or impressed by a small penis. Some men have a tiny penis that never becomes fully erect. They can still have a high sex drive. They can enjoy vaginal penetration and thrusting a much as any man. Regardless of size, a man is proud of his erection because of the pleasure it provides. A man’s penis is the core of his sexuality and his masculinity. This contrasts with women’s disinterest in the clitoris.
Women do not have erections. Women first encounter the phenomenon as virgins. Women are aware of a man’s erection primarily immediately before a man has sex. But erections can occur at any time especially in the presence of an attractive woman. Young men often have a bulge in their pants that can be inconvenient and uncomfortable. If women notice, they laugh out of embarrassment. Evidently women do not experience tumescence nor are they aroused by the presence of a potential partner.
Men are quick to assert their superiority over women in every respect. Yet when it comes to orgasm, men are happy to accept that female performance outstrips male. It seems strange that men assume women experience the same pleasure as men without the benefit of their magnificent sex organ.
Men assume that women experience the same sex drive and achieve exactly the same intensity of arousal and orgasm as men do. Yet they don’t need an erection to achieve the same result. So what are men making all the fuss about? The sexual frustration men talk about is presumably just a figment of their imagination. Women certainly don’t complain of it. Men’s pride in their erection is similarly an over-inflated vanity about nothing special.
… men come to the sexual experience with only his porno-sex-ed and general socialization – ergo pleasing a woman means: 1) A big penis 2) Lasting a long time during intercourse 3) Making her orgasm. … Instead many women want an emotional connection, intimacy and feeling nurtured. (Trina Read 2014)