Friday, July 19, 2019
Home Biological aspects of sexuality Human reproduction Intercourse is the heterosexual lovemaking act

Intercourse is the heterosexual lovemaking act

Both male and female sexuality contribute towards reproduction. Men have a genital focus while women focus on upper body lovemaking. Throughout their lives, men focus on the eroticism that causes their arousal while women focus their lives on caring for a family: the consequence of sex. Women enjoy the platonic emotions of nurturing love, companionship and affection. They also employ behaviours to attract and retain a man’s interest.

Heterosexual men assume that what pleases them must please a woman equally as well. Heterosexual women accept whatever stimulation a man offers. This causes endless confusion, when coupled with the belief that women must orgasm through such activity. It would be convenient for all, if men and women had a mutual enthusiasm for intercourse. But (beyond the initial curiosity) women have little interest in the basic act of impregnation.

Men’s proactive role is a natural consequence of their arousal. Men want to enjoy the erotic turn-on of interacting with a lover as well as obtaining sexual release through penetration. Given their lack of arousal with a lover, women do not approach sex, focused on achieving their own orgasm. Neither does a woman have an incentive to be proactive in sexual activity of any kind unless she is motivated to engage on pleasing a lover. Women accept men’s much greater interest in sexual activity and that it is men’s role to drive sex.

When a man and a woman are attracted to each other, intercourse feels very natural. This is no coincidence. The male and female body fit together to provide a sexual coupling. The mating position used by other mammals is rear entry, where the man penetrates the woman’s vagina from behind (doggy position). Women tend to feel humiliated by this subjugated position. Western society favours the missionary position (man facing the woman) because it is more acceptable to women, being less sexually explicit.

More adventurous couples use different positions from time to time as a means of providing some variety. Many couples experiment early on with different positions for intercourse. But they usually resume missionary style intercourse, which involves least work for a woman. A woman experiences intercourse as a lovemaking act where a man affectionately caresses and kisses her. Intercourse demonstrates his sexual admiration for her (his ability to be aroused by her) and his sex drive (ability to impregnate her).

Men’s sex drive focuses them on intercourse as an erotic act. The missionary position’s disadvantage is that it does not allow a man to see the genital action. Men enjoy trying more explicit positions, which allow them to observe penetration. Just as men are aroused by observing their own erect penis during masturbation, they also enjoy watching their penis enter a lover’s body. Women are not aroused by such sights, which they consider crude. Men tend to prefer any position that allows them freedom of movement and the ability to control their own stimulation through thrusting.

Modern pressure on women to be men’s sexual equals has led to more couples having sex in daylight or with the lights on. This favours men’s enjoyment of intercourse as an erotic act. A disadvantage for women is that their lack of mental engagement is more visible to a lover. Men’s increased awareness of a woman’s response has made faking commonplace as a means of facilitating male orgasm. The need for a woman to appear more involved in lovemaking has contributed to the emotional bonding process.

In a primitive society, an attractive woman has little choice about offering sex to men. Her choice is to have many lovers (whoever cometh) or to choose one man to fight the others off. It is in a woman’s interests to choose one man who she likes and trusts. She has no need for sexual release but she does want a lover’s protection. Her sexual loyalty makes it more likely that he will agree to support any children resulting from the sexual activity.

Some animals (notably birds) mate for life. But there is no evidence to indicate that men are naturally monogamous. In fact, all the evidence points the other way. So a woman needs to provide an incentive for a man to be loyal. A man is much less likely to go looking for another woman if he has opportunities for regular intercourse with his partner. Most women accept this trade implicitly in their relationships with men. Most women offer sex because they identify a man as a worthy mate and a supportive companion.

A woman has no need to engage in sexual activity with anyone. Many women exist very happily without sex. But if a woman wants a relationship with a man, she knows that sex will be expected. She also accepts that she is obliged to offer regular sex if she wants to keep a man committed to her. Younger men have a strong need for penetrative sex on a regular basis. No man is devoted to a woman for long if she does not offer the sex he needs.

Intercourse has always been implicit within marriage. A man loves a woman who provides for his sexual needs. A woman demonstrates her love by providing her partner with the sexual release he needs. A man’s gratitude motivates him protect and support both his mate and their children. A woman hopes that by offering a man the short-term pleasure of sexual release, she will obtain his love, respect and support for her family goals.

Women’s top 5 turn-ons. 1. Romance 2. Commitment 3. Communications 4. Intimacy 5. Non-sexual touching (Allan & Barbara Pease 1999)