Few men are interested in sexuality as a scientific topic. Men heavily promote their own view because it is vitally important to them. Sexual politics is created by men’s desire for intercourse. Men will not accept what women say about sex unless it accords with their own view. Specifically, they want to hear that a woman wants intercourse as much as they do. Women also promote female sexuality because there is money to be made. Propaganda succeeds because of sexual ignorance. Bravado and ego tend to work against anyone who attempts to engage in constructive discussion.
Our society’s willingness to allow women to promote their sexuality, without ever being expected to justify their claimed experiences in explicit detail leads to much of the ignorance about female sexuality that we have today. Women don’t eulogise about male orgasm and neither do men boast about it. The interest in female orgasm is not a scientific, challenging kind of interest. It is a political desire to promote orgasm claims, no matter how ridiculous. But men are much more active than women ever are about claiming female orgasm occurs especially during sexual activity with a lover. This is the political nature of the topic that interests more men than women.
By refusing to accept women’s sexuality for what it is, men put emotional pressure on women. Men say that women are frigid, which means unloving. If a woman loves a man then she should naturally want sex. Men say that it is normal and natural for everyone to want sex. Women are bullied, intimidated and humiliated into providing the sex that men need. Most women assume that it is their fault that they cannot be like men. Men and women’s very different sexual responsiveness is a product of our evolution.
Women’s embarrassment over sex gives men a political advantage. Men assume their greater interest in and knowledge of sexual matters qualifies them to define women’s sexuality for them. Men enjoy talking about sex and by doing so, they promote their fantasies. Men define female sexuality as they would like it to be. Women’s general timidity and reluctance to comment on sex allow men to do this. Even if a woman challenges their view, men react as they are entitled define women’s sexual experiences. Men own the concept of female orgasm. The ego of “You obviously haven’t met the right man to make you orgasm!” indicates the male perspective.
If men and women wanted the same thing there would be no sexual politics. Men and women are at odds because they want different things from each other. Most women want affectionate companionship and family. It is this desire for children that continues to cause women to be dependent on men. Women need something to offer in return. That thing is sex. Anyone who suggests that the pleasure is equal does not understand the laws of nature.
Men are taller, heavier and stronger than women. Women don’t fight as men do. Only a very naïve person would suggest that men do not use this physical advantage to get what they want from women. Men don’t encourage women to work. In fact, men openly acknowledge that they like women to be financially dependent on them. Men know they can use this financial advantage to make women feel obliged to offer them regular sex in return.
Men want to believe that women can orgasm from intercourse because this might make them more sexually willing. But this not logical. The evidence for female orgasm would be women’s enthusiasm for intercourse. Porn acts as an emotional security blanket reassuring men that women are always amenable to intercourse so that their sexual outlet is guaranteed.
Male propaganda far outweighs any attempt by women to put men right. This is for a number of reasons.
- Men’s interest in discussing sex ad nauseam far outweighs women’s extremely low to negative interest in the topic.
- Men are physically and psychologically more forceful than women so they can use brute force to ensure that their view prevails.
- Women want to be attractive to men. They cannot do this if they do not silently ignore men’s claims that sex is fantastic.
- Women depend on men’s support to have children. So women have an emotional investment in their relationship with a man.
Ask a woman in any developing country and she will tell you that sex is for male pleasure and making babies. Try asking a woman in a developed country the same question and you get silence. In our bravado driven society, women don’t want to feel subjugated by men. Female orgasm justifies women’s role in an activity that focuses on male pleasure. The fact that women’s lifestyles are subsidised by their partners, is overlooked.
Women ensure that sexual references are avoided in their presence by showing their displeasure in non-verbal ways. Silent abstention is easy and keeps the peace. Most people would be tempted by an offer of financial security for life. This is what marriage represents to women. There’s little to be gained by taking on conflict with a man who is supporting the family.
As the feminist group the Redstockings put it, for many women marriage is one of the few forms of employment that is readily available. (Hite 1993)