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Women’s orgasm claims do not result in more sex

Let’s imagine, for a moment, that men and women have the same level of responsiveness (orgasm frequency). Even so, it is unlikely that two people would have exactly the same responsiveness because responsiveness varies between individuals. There would inevitably be times when one or other person wanted more sex. There would be many complaints from women of all ages that they were not getting enough sex. This does not happen.

Alfred Kinsey found a correlation between male responsiveness and the age at which they became adolescent (defined by a boy’s first ejaculation). Men who became adolescent before the age of twelve were about twice as responsive (their orgasm frequencies were twice as high) as men who became adolescent at a later age. A single man may engage in intercourse with different partners and masturbate regularly. Kinsey also found that once men married, their rates of masturbation decreased as they became more dependent on intercourse (usually with their wives).

Individuals have varying levels of responsiveness. Logically, married men’s intercourse frequencies should be affected by their partner’s responsiveness. This is not the case. Kinsey was surprised to find that the same correlation between age of adolescence and orgasm frequency held as much for married men as for single men. This means that couples have intercourse with frequencies that depend solely on a man’s responsiveness. A woman’s responsiveness has no impact on a couple’s sex life.

Kinsey also found couples have intercourse with a regularity that is not matched by any other activity that women engage in. He found that women orgasm through masturbation or lesbian activities only once every 2 to 3 weeks. It is highly unlikely that women are having orgasms every time a man has one through intercourse. Couples have intercourse on average between two and four times a week when young but this drops to about once a week by age forty because of the decline in male responsiveness.

Women who boast about orgasm with a lover are typically dismissive of female masturbation. They are intent on keeping men happy. They have never had a real orgasm in their whole life. If women experienced orgasm in the way that men think they should, then there would be no embarrassment over sex. Women would want sex as much as men. Perhaps even more, since intercourse is so effortless for women.

The willingness of some women to provide male turn-ons by suggesting that male fantasies are a reality make it difficult for couples to find answers. The fact that women do not respond as men think they should makes sex taboo. Research findings show that women who talk of orgasm are no more enthusiastic about sex than any other woman. Rates of intercourse are determined by male interest alone. Women who claim to orgasm are no more amenable to intercourse than other women. Nor do they initiate intercourse any more than women who know that orgasm is impossible.

If women wanted sex, they would walk around naked all the time and display themselves for male appreciation. Women are modest about appearing naked because they understand that men will want sex so they take steps to avoid it. Women provide turn-ons that are directed towards getting what women want. This is sometimes called ‘prick teasing’ because a woman’s objective is not to provide satisfaction but merely to titillate.

Heterosexual men are proud of the fact that they don’t pay attention to their looks. Enhancing attractiveness is an effeminate behaviour that is associated with gay men. Movies even make fun of guys for being unattractive either in looks or the way they behave. Men never give a thought to why a woman would ever want to be intimate with someone with little personal hygiene and who makes no effort to keep in shape or dress attractively. Men assume that attraction only needs to work one way (from man to woman) because intercourse relies only on a man’s erection.

The vagina is involved in reproduction and so we assume that it must also have a role in causing female orgasm. But this does not follow. Female orgasm is quite separate from the reproductive process. Men assume that because reproduction involves a woman being penetrated she must thereby experience arousal and orgasm. Such a situation would be very convenient to the male because it would make a woman more sexually willing.

A woman’s body sustains others. Her breasts feed the baby and her vagina satisfies a man’s sexual needs. A woman may feel loved just because she is needed by those she loves. A woman can enjoy the ability of her body to provide a man with the sexual release that he needs. Women may assume their vagina is a sex organ because it provides men so much pleasure.

Many women don’t like the idea of teenage (or adult) children having sex in their home. The idea of sexual activity is offensive to them unless it is linked to the commitment of a serious relationship A woman expects sexual activity to occur in the context of an emotional connection (love).

Whether or not she herself reaches orgasm, many a female finds satisfaction in knowing that her husband or other sexual partner has enjoyed the contact, and in realizing that she has contributed to the male’s pleasure. (Alfred Kinsey 1953)

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