The key assumption (that is erroneous) is the belief that women orgasm with a lover by any means. When research established that women are capable of orgasm, it was immediately assumed that women should naturally orgasm during sociable activity as a result of the stimulation men provide during intercourse. It was not appreciated that women are only capable of orgasm because of an evolutionary anomaly.
Responsiveness is a male characteristic. Orgasm is primarily a male response that is linked to ejaculation. Orgasm is a mechanism for rewarding the male for successfully ejaculating and potentially impregnating a female. A woman’s orgasm has nothing to do with reproduction and so nothing to do with intercourse or any other sexual activity with a lover.
Women are confident that they can justify orgasms with a lover because such a phenomenon is described and portrayed convincingly in erotic fiction and pornography. Women explain such orgasms by attributing them to stimulation of either the vagina or the clitoris. Their choice of anatomy depends mainly on fashion and a woman’s level of education.
If stimulation of the vagina caused female orgasm (through intercourse) there wouldn’t be a mystery that needed researching in the first place. Equally if the clitoris worked with a lover, then as soon as it was pointed out (by Kinsey and Hite) women would have instantly agreed. But why do we need researchers to tell us what anatomy is responsible for female orgasm? Surely women (and their lovers) should know?
The reason we don’t know how a woman is aroused is because women themselves do not know. Unless a woman masturbates to orgasm she has no means of knowing. Female arousal does not occur spontaneously or with a lover. It has to be consciously generated. Very few women discover how to do this because it requires a minimum level of responsiveness. Being responsive causes us to find aspects of eroticism appealing so that we can use explicit scenarios to become sufficiently aroused for orgasm.
No one is interested in the experiences of women who masturbate to orgasm. So it is not understood that the use of fantasy is vital in providing psychological arousal. Clitoral stimulation, although also required, is almost secondary. If a woman cannot come up with a suitable fantasy to arouse her, then she can stimulate the clitoris as much as she likes and nothing will happen. A woman who masturbates to orgasm realises that the same experience is impossible with a lover by any means.
An organ such as the vagina, which is essentially a cavity, could never be a sex organ. The vagina has evolved from primitive egg ducts which, like most other internal organs of the body, are poorly supplied with nerves. We have evolved touch sensitivity that protects our bodies from external injury. We only have nerves sensitive to touch, in anatomy that can be harmed by stimuli from outside the body.
There is no sensation from stimulating the interior of the vagina. Because of its insensitivity gynaecologists can perform minor surgery on the vagina without using anaesthetic. The birth canal is intentionally without nerve endings. The vagina functions as a receptacle for semen. During childbirth, the vagina (as part of the birth canal) has to expand to allow a baby to be born. So a penis, no matter what size it is, has little impact.
Men do not have a vagina so women would have to have evolved an ability to orgasm quite separately from the male. It is much more logical that women orgasm because they have in common with men rather than by stimulating anatomy men don’t have. A woman’s orgasmic ability comes from the anatomy that women share with men. The same embryonic structure that grows into the penis (in a man) develops into the clitoris in a woman.
If someone is capable of orgasm, they must also be able to achieve it for themselves. The penis and clitoris are easily reached by the hands so that self-stimulation (masturbation) is possible. The clitoris is the only female erectile organ. During (often subconscious) periods of arousal, increased blood flow (in older women) can cause the internal clitoral organ to swell. Women’s genitalia (clitoris and labia) are anatomically equivalent to men’s genitalia (penis and testicles) and are similarly positioned.
Female orgasm occurs when a woman emulates the male role in intercourse rather than complementing it (through intercourse). A woman masturbates (to orgasm) by emulating the male role in intercourse. She instinctively simulates the male drive to thrust to orgasm. Orgasm is achieved through massaging the blood flow within the erectile organ. The position a woman assumes when a man (or object) stimulates the vagina is incompatible with how female orgasm is achieved.
Some 45 per cent of the females in the sample recognized that their lack of sexual responsiveness had been a factor in limiting their pre-marital activity. (Alfred Kinsey 1953)