Learn About Sexuality

Orgasm is a very specific one-off sexual release

A sex organ goes through a cycle of arousal. Initially it is unaroused. This means that the penis is flaccid and a woman is unaware of any sensitivity in her pelvic region. Both sexes experience tumescence (blood flow in the genitals) when aroused. As the mind responds to eroticism, blood flows to the sex organ (penis or clitoris) causing a gradual build-up in tension or pressure. An erection gives a man a strong urge to engage in intercourse. Tumescence gives a woman a heightened awareness of her clitoral organ.

Once a person is conscious of their arousal, they may be motivated to stimulate their sex organ (penis or clitoris). A person learns from experience that if they massage their sex organ, they may achieve orgasm. A person focuses their mind on some aspect of eroticism that they know has caused them to become aroused in the past. Arousal is biological (automatic) for a younger man. Women only generate sufficient arousal for orgasm by making effort to focus on an explicitly erotic scenario.

As our mind responds to eroticism, blood flows into the corpora cavernosa within the sex organ. The corpora cavernosa are within the shaft of the penis and inside the internal clitoral organ. We gradually become conscious of this physical arousal (tumescence). But the evidence and sensation of physical arousal is much stronger in men than in women.

For a fifth of men (22%) orgasm is primarily a genital reaction while nearly half of men (45%) have some build-up (body tension). The remaining four variations are similar to the first two but can include additional trembling, fainting, frenzied movements, convulsions, collapse, laughter and talking. Women’s experience of orgasm is less dramatic and much less intense.

We orgasm by massaging the phallus, specifically the blood-flow within the erectile organ. We use a squeeze technique to massage the corpora cavernosa within the sex organ. A man uses the thumb and two fingers of one hand to press firmly on the corpora cavernosa, which are inside the shaft of the penis. A woman uses fingers from both hands to press down firmly and massage the corpora cavernosa inside the internal clitoral organ.

This massaging motion is continued rhythmically until orgasm is reached. The manual stimulation of the sex organ is combined with a tensing of the buttock muscles to pressure the internal organ from behind. The whole body is tense and the mind is focused on achieving orgasm. Orgasm involves a release of tension that is built up as a person becomes aroused.

During orgasm a person loses full consciousness of their immediate surroundings. Once a woman feels the tension start to build, her mental focus (which blocks out all awareness of her physical surroundings) is on the fantasy until she reaches orgasm. It’s difficult to identify where the sensations of orgasm come from exactly. Orgasm is felt as contractions in the pelvic region and a sense of releasing sexual emotions in the brain.

Muscular tensions in the pelvic region increase, culminating in a peak that is suddenly dissipated (providing a sense of release). Orgasm involves the sporadic contractions of the muscles, the sensations of ejaculation of semen (men only as there is no equivalent female sensation) and the sensation of the extra blood (accumulated in the genitals) flowing away from the area.

After orgasm there is a sense of release and relaxation as the blood flows away from the penis and vulva. Men fall asleep after the exertions of intercourse. Women masturbate as a way of falling asleep. An orgasm is a release of sexual energy. Following sexual release, we feel sated. We have a similar feeling after eating a big meal but especially if we were very hungry beforehand. We also feel sleepy after a heavy meal. The effect is stronger for men because male orgasm is stronger than female orgasm.

After orgasm, the sex organ (penis or clitoris) cannot easily return to an aroused state. Typically an orgasm is followed by a period of resolution before another is possible. Some highly responsive young boys can attempt a number of orgasms sequentially with little rest in between. For adults, most of the time, there is a period of at least a few hours before the individual is receptive to being aroused again. In responsive women, this period may extend for weeks. Sexual tension builds up subconsciously.

Considerable psychiatric therapy can be wasted on persons (especially females) who are misjudged to be cases of repression when, in actuality, at least some of them never were equipped to respond erotically. (Alfred Kinsey 1948)

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