While 50% of the male population is exclusively heterosexual, only 4% is exclusively homosexual. Around 10% of men at some time in their lives have predominantly homosexual relationships for a period of a few years.
Bisexual activity is relatively common for men. Some men are aroused by both sexes and many men (37%) have had at least one gay encounter that ended in their own orgasm. Many of these are one-offs or sporadic. There is a social bias in favour of heterosexuality but some men may enjoy the more proactive and explicit genital pleasuring of homosexual sex play.
Research indicates that a high proportion of homosexual and bisexual men have sex with many different men and 22 per cent have had more than ten partners. This contrasts with only 29 per cent of women with homosexual experience have sex with more than two partners and only 4 per cent have had more than ten partners.
Men’s responsiveness causes them to focus on exploring any stimulation that may be pleasurable with little regard for issues of personal hygiene. Women’s lack of responsiveness, on the other hand, makes personal hygiene a priority. This makes anal sex a much less interesting prospect for a woman. The possible pleasure of the stimulation does not compensate for the taboo of the activity and concerns about personal hygiene.
Women engage in intercourse partly because there is no physical sensation. Just as they prefer not to watch genital action, women also prefer to be oblivious to what is happening in their pelvic region. This is one of the reasons why heterosexuals rarely engage in anal intercourse. Other reasons for women to avoid anal intercourse include the need to communicate, for the man to use some sensitivity and for a woman to reconcile her natural instincts to reject the practical realities of engaging in taboo sexual activity.
Homosexual men, being both givers and receivers of anal intercourse, are more likely to understand the need for a cautious approach. But also anal intercourse is expected between gay men and so needs little discussion. Even when heterosexual men engage in anal intercourse, they may prefer to ejaculate into the vagina. This is very natural given the male sex drive.
Research indicates that the numbers of homosexuals in the population does not increase over time. These minority groups have a political motivation to be recognised by society that far outweighs their representation in the population. Intersex (born with genitals of both sexes) are incredibly rare.
Few people object to lesbians, who are viewed as slightly odd but harmless. It is men’s desire for penetrative sex that makes men much more of a sexual threat. Gay men tend to be highly promiscuous and focused primarily on genital techniques. Sexual pleasure is based on physical gratification.
Men call their male companions ‘ladies’ as an insult. This implies that they are not men but people who are being indulged with special privileges because they are more vulnerable than men. One reason heterosexual men disrespect gay men is because one partner must be willing to be the receiver of intercourse. Men respect foremost the biological role of being the penetrator. But also this recognises the fact that the penetrator obtains the satisfaction and pleasure of penetration and thrusting until ejaculation.
Men wouldn’t be so happy if someone was pushing to penetrate their orifices (mouth or anus). This probably explains the prejudice against homosexual men. Neither would men be so happy if society was full of naked male bodies posted on every street corner with close ups of penis and testicles. Nor would men be very happy with unrealistic images of male sexual performance. Women are expected to be immune to parallel images of their own sex. Some women find it offensive that women’s breasts and vaginas are posted everywhere. It’s not a turn-on for women.
Women typically get on well with homosexual men. Gay men often have the social skills that women appreciate but straight men lack. Homophobia is largely down a certain kind of heterosexual man, who disrespects men (and women) for being on the receiving end of penetrative sex. Some men have mannerisms that we call ‘effeminate’ because they are more typically associated with women. Effeminate men are not necessarily homosexual.
Perhaps there is a misconception that gay men cannot obtain pleasure from penetrating a vagina. But it is much more likely that this is not an issue of the stimulation involved. The issue is the fact that gay men are not aroused by women’s bodies. They do not find the female sexual anatomy remotely arousing. So they are not aroused by any activity with a woman. The stimulation involved in any sexual situation is purely that – stimulation. The mental turn-ons that cause arousal and orgasm are much more critical.
This means that homosexual responses had occurred in about half as many females as males … Many of the males had been highly promiscuous, sometimes finding scores or hundreds of sexual partners. (Kinsey 1953)